7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week… and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

Fendi - FW12 beauty

While my own beauty choices are becoming increasingly (maybe even disturbingly, considering my line of work) classic and boring (I guess that’s what 6+ years in this industry will do to you), I love a good beauty freak show as much as the next person. And I don’t know what happened this year in Milan, but the designers did NOT disappoint. You know, if things like orange eyebrows, or wearing four or more contrasting shades of shimmery eyeshadow all at one time, are important to you.

I’ll let you take a look only on the condition that you promise me you’ll never, ever try these at home. I mean, this stuff is a World of No. And they’re not even obscure designers—I’m talking Prada, Fendi, Versace…. Luckily, there were a couple of houses (Gucci only gets a 0.5) whose makeup I can endorse. Come and look at the fug, and the fab!

 WTF #1: Orange eyebrows at Prada

Prada FW12 makeup 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

So apparently the look they were going for at Prada was “manga”—kind of synthetic and doll-like and virtual reality-esque. That’s good, because my reality does not include walking down the street looking like this.

WTF #2: Rainbow eyeshadow at Roberto Cavalli

Roberto Cavalli FW12 makeup 2 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

Oh God, tragedy. I think I actually had makeup similar to this when, as a newbie beauty ed, I naively booked in with a visiting Clé de Peau makeup artist before a TIFF party. Girl put every colour in the collection on my eyelids ALL AT ONCE (not to mention gave me wrinkles I didn’t even have from the sheer amount of foundation she piled on my face). Needless to say, I ran home and scrubbed it all off.

And this is the story of why I don’t let anyone do my makeup.

Anyway, here is the closed-eye view so you can really appreciate it:

Roberto Cavalli FW12 makeup 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

Just… wow.

WTF #3: Ghoul beauty at Marni

Marni FW12 beauty 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

You can’t even see the terrible bangs in this photo—which is funny because they’re not even the worst of this look. (I’ve also had these bangs given to me, again, as a newbie beauty ed. And THAT’S why I don’t let anyone except Bill Angst cut my hair now.)

Anyway! What primarily concerns me here is the purple pigment around the eyes, intended to make them look more sunken in. That’s right—this was intentional. Okaaaay then.

WTF #4: Lisbeth Salander-style bangs at Versace

Versace FW12 beauty 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

We all know Rooney Mara has these bangs not by choice but because of the Dragon Tattoo thing. I think they looked cool on her at the Oscars, but come on designers—let’s not go making them a thing, okay? Please?

WTF #5: Ridic beehives at Moschino

Moschino FW12 beauty 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

Let Amy Winehouse rest in peace, I say! Also, I need a time out from all of this overt retro stuff. The makeup’s cute, but please no on the hair.

WTF #6: Chevron shadow at Giorgio Armani

Giorgio Armani FW12 makeup 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

It’s almost sacrilegious to criticize makeup by Linda Cantello. I shouldn’t. This actually doesn’t look wrong when the eyes are open… but closed? People would not understand.

WTF #7: Random eyeshadow and crazy wet braids at Fendi

Fendi FW12 beauty 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

Wow, so much to parse in one single look! Ignore the plastic on the braids (yes, braidS—there are multiple), that’s just there because this shot was taken backstage. In its full glory, this ‘do features wet-look hair AND pigtails fashioned from multiple braids. And let’s not forget that slash of white eyeshadow.

I know, WTF.

Now let’s cleanse our palettes and look at some pretty:

Ethereal gorgeousness at Emilio Pucci

Emilio Pucci FW12 beauty 2 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

Love love love. Don’t you want to run out and get one of these braided headwraps, like, RIGHT NOW? (Sephora sells them, BTW. Unfortunately not in my specific now-”apricot” hair colour. Darn.) There are other elements, besides the hair, which also please me: the full brows, the blush (but of course) and the just barely-stained lips. Yay.

Rose-petal lips at Jil Sander

Jil Sander FW12 makeup 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

Just when you think you’ve seen all the pinks in the world, along comes a new, ever-so-slightly different one to make you fall in love all over again. This mouth is Chanel Rouge Allure Velvet Lipstick in L’Élégante (first lined with Chanel Lip Pencil in #32 Pivoine). Note the matte finish.

“Dark romance” at Gucci

Gucci FW12 makeup 7 big beauty WTF moments from Milan Fashion Week... and 2.5 looks I can actually get behind

I’m only giving Gucci a 0.5 because there’s something about this mouth that’s a teensy bit scary to me. Dark bordeaux lipstick with red lipstick and gloss in the centre? And bleached-out brows? Small children will run! That said, I think you’d get a similar effect with a slightly toned-down, single-shade lip, and normal eyebrows. Thoughts?

Tell me:

Did these looks give you a case of the WTFs too?
Which one scares you the most?
Would you try any of these yourself?

14 Comments

Marionberry Style
Thursday, March 8/2012 at 11:56 am

Oh my gosh – I seriously laughed at loud at so many comments here! Such a great post! I personally don’t get half of these looks. Was Marni trying to make the models look like meth addicts? Well, job accomplished. Just ewww.
And I would be pissed if I was a model that had to cut my hair a la Dragon Tattoo. Not flattering on anyone (even a model!)
Anyway, thanks for the great laugh :-)
XO – Marion

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ana p
Thursday, March 8/2012 at 12:09 pm

Cavalli’s model looks like she was punched with a rainbow glove. I quite like the Gucci “goth” inspired look and find it a version of ethereal. Pucci’s is yawnzies to me…a hint of colour or definition wouldn’t hurt, and would take this from Sunday afternoon brunch, to more of a luxe look.

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QuiteLight
Thursday, March 8/2012 at 12:19 pm

Heehee! WTF #7 – Anyone else have the “Twist & Twirl Barbie” when they were a kid, & it came with that pink plastic device that twirled her (& your!) hair into ropes just like this lady’s?

& OK, I’ve done #4, during my “Betty Page” period. It didn’t look much better, but it was painfully cool.

#2… I like Looking at it, pretty colours! But for the office? “Punched with a rainbow glove” sums it up, Ana P.!

I like the minimal eyes & stronger lips, which have been calling to me lately. Which is really surprising, since I am normally all about the eyes, & leave lips pale so as not to distract.

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Brooke. P
Friday, July 5/2013 at 3:03 pm

okay so, i really really dont like #3 or #4 … ew i think the bangs on #4 look gross. thats all i have to say.

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Meeka
Thursday, March 8/2012 at 12:40 pm

I think wtf 1 & 2 are gorgeous in an artistic way. Not so much a wearable way. 3, 4, 6 & 7 are all Hell No!’s. The makeup is fine on 5 but the hair is horrid. And actually the brows too, what the heck is going on there? It’s just not right. The “good” looks are all a little boring to me, though pretty enough.

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Denise
Thursday, March 8/2012 at 3:30 pm

Michele why don’t you get a bleached out braided headband( or make your own with weave pieces) and bring to your next color appt? I’m sure Bill could match it..

I heart this post though I LOVE the gucci look though in my life normal brows and a single shade bourdeaux lip. I really would try that.

Would anyone offer thoughts. I see white liner on the water line, warm white shadow inner corner/browbone and I think a purlply/brown color in crease, lower outter corner. Lots of mascara on natural upper lashes. Brown or bronzer contouring and of course the lip. Does anyone else see anything I’ve missed? I was thinking for fun I might even do my (very thin could work) brows like the prada only in a very light warm beige like the gucci brows?! Any tips form the makeup mavens?

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Denise
Thursday, March 8/2012 at 3:45 pm

Sorry for bad puncuation

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Cassandra
Thursday, March 8/2012 at 4:35 pm

I love the Pucci. I actually did that last night. I went really sheer and bare.

If dark circles are in, I’m a natural, ;-)

I actually think the multi-shade eyeshadow is cool, but not for real life, obvs.

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Cassandra
Thursday, March 8/2012 at 4:36 pm

PS- I have that same shade pink lipstick in a W&W dupe. I forget the number, but it’s one of their long stay matte lipsticks.

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Stefanie
Friday, March 9/2012 at 10:18 am

It looks like the braided headband is done with the model’s own hair! Looks easy enough to do but might not work out if your hair is really thin. Trying it today!

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Nomadic D
Friday, March 9/2012 at 3:09 pm

Love those rose petal lips! Like, A LOT! Also secretly loving the fact that that young gorgeous model looks so lovely even with those little under eye wrinkles. I’m not being mean, I’m just celebrating beauty with creases! And yes, it makes me feel way better about my own little lines…

http://nomadic-d.blogspot.com/

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B
Friday, March 9/2012 at 9:49 pm

I’m a regular reader here and I’m so glad with your picture choice for the Pucci look. The model’s name is Montana Cox and she’s the recent winner of Australia’s Next Top Model! I am a big fan of the show (it produces real models) and I’ve been following her career post-show :) She walked for a lot of shows is Paris this season such as Dior, Lanvin and Chanel! If you do a Paris fashion week look then you should come across more of her photos. *end of crazy fan rant*

Oh! and I really like the Jil Sanders look and the Pucci. I will try out the braid thing tomorrow.

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hami
Friday, June 7/2013 at 2:52 am

Sorry, but I was looking at the chanel website to find the lipstick and it
don´t exist:

http://www.chanel.com/de_DE/parfum-schonheit/Make-up-Lippenstifte-ROUGE-ALLURE-VELVET–125230?sku=125233

Could it be, that you understand the color wrong?

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Comment Avatar Michelle Villett
Thursday, July 11/2013 at 9:09 pm

This post was from early 2012 so it was probably limited edition.

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